Phew, I missed blogging.
Anyways, let me share to you what have happened to me this Holy Week. To be frank with you, I'm not really the religious type but I do pray, everytime, everyday. I just don't attend special religious activities. Whatever might that mean to you.
Back to our topic...
I am surprised that I felt renewed. Something has washed my impurities for the past three days. Every holy week there is a Lenten retreat that our family attends, and it's main goal is focused on strengthening our bond with God. I do not know what happened, but lately I found myself sleepy when listening to speakers. I know it's wrong, I do not know if I am uninterested or not, but what I am certain of is I nearly drifted throughout the last day.
So bad of me... And yet, unexpectedly, the speeches, the talks and the lessons that I paid attention to halfheartedly echoed until NOW. Vividly.
And it affected me. Still AFFECTS me.
I am really surprised how the hand of God can do wonders to a sinful mortal like me.
I just want to share this to you.
I was texting my friend Joyce at that retreat. Meanwhile, the speaker told us to stop for awhile and close our eyes, and feel the touch of the love of God. The network reception was steady back then, but at that instant, at the time I was about to say to Jael(Joyce ) to wait, the same time that the activity started, there was no network coverage. I was really astounded. So astounded that I closed my eyes and waited for the Lord's touch. Maybe He wanted to tell me that He is still there. I know He is there, I have never ever doubted my faith for Him, but our bond is weakening and He may be calling my attention to fortify what we have back then.
Maybe God wanted me to focus my attention to HIM. Just to Him. Pondering on what I have done, I felt that I should feel ashamed for what I have done. I cannot give a few minutes solely to HIM. And to think He has given up His Son to redeem us from all our sins.
Maybe I'm slowly drifting away from Him. And this just might be the reason He is calling me back again.
A miracle. Yes it is. At the end of those three days, I realized I was changed. Maybe a bit, but I am sure for the better.
Dear God,
First of all, I want to thank You for giving me a handful of blessings everyday of my life. My words and actions can never give back in return what You have given me. But allow me to express my gratitude in this simple prayer.
I want to apologize for a millionth time. I know that my sins far outweigh my words and acts of repentance. Again, I would like to say sorry for disobeying Your will.
I have been a sinful human. I have been the cause of the death of Your Son. I know that His sacrifice is the price of our redemption and yet, I can't help but do the same sins I committed.
It may not seem right to ask from You again. But I know that You are willing to listen to those who seek you, to those who find you. I am now asking again, for the guidance of the Holy Spirit so that I may be able to follow the path you have already laid out for me.
I do not want to give any assurance my Lord because I am afraid to fail it again. But I will try my very best to bring out the good in every actions I make. And by doing so, I will attempt to influence the others to do the same thing.
Bless me O Lord, for I have sinned.
I hope You will not grow tired of me. I love you my Lord.
Amen.
Love lots,
Geneva
P.S. Welcome to the new me. :)
P.P.S. The signal returned after that activity. Instantly.
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