This night might have ended well.
*might*
I really hate it when I am led to believe that what I want is in my reach right now. Like when people say, "Oh you are now accepted" or "You got in" thingymajiggy, and then you get all hyped up because you already see yourself in those stuffs you have just anticipated before.
Take note you did not even expect, you just waited for the results and got a positive one.
And then you start sharing this to all of your friends, beaming with all thepride rooted from genuine happiness, that you just got what you want. They start to congratulate you and you start to thank them for saying it. Whew, very happy indeed.
Then imagine, after a period filled with bliss, everything just snapped all at once.
It turns out, you actually did not get the one you thought you already have. "I'm sorry to inform you" or "I regret" starts to pour on the space that once said "You are now accepted stuff".
Hay. I'm a sore loser if I sulk over this, but dude, I already spread the news and I have to retract it. Just because I received this happy message and placed me in a world of make-believe.
Epal. Kupal. It's not that I'm hurt "hurt", I just hate the idea of taking back what you've once said. Lalo na kapag lumalabas na pinaasa ka. It's just so pathetic man.
Bear with my vagueness. As usual pride overtook reason once again and as I much as I wanted to share what really made my almost-good day a friggin' one, I just thought I wanted to save some piece of myself from shame (of myself). Even though I don't care what others say, not that they'll say anything (most certainly), I just hate the notion of repudiating what I said, specifically those that I mentioned proudly. Argh talaga!
'Yun lang. At least you know, how egocentric am I. Ok lang. Katulad ko rin naman ang iba, ayaw nang bawiin ang mga nasabi na nila. Sayang lang sa laway, sayang lang sa energy.
Whatever. This is a nonsense rant again. :))
About Me
- Geneve Guyano
- Manila, NCR, Philippines
- a Development Studies student struggling with conciseness (in writing!)
Facebook Badge
Post a Comment